How to do a first dance

Like every other element of your wedding, your wedding dance can go one of a thousand ways. This is a crucial moment of your reception, and it should be a fun, memorable one.

Often however, this part of the wedding leaves the couple feeling awkward. It’s all-eyes-on-you — one slip up and… Well, you get it. Everyone’s watching. We’re not here to scare you, but to help you navigate your first dance and turn it into a fun-filled, captivating moment for all the right reasons.

Pick a vibe

All romance and grace

Envisaging a graceful float around the room? Great! You’re probably thinking about a traditional, ballroom-style Bridal Waltz. This often involves lessons, a set of choreographed steps, and a slow romantic song. With a quick Google, it’s easy to find a ballroom dance teacher near you, and often it comes down to a few lessons a month or so before the big day.  

A good teacher will match the steps to your level of experience, so you won’t be set up with complicated moves that leave you in a twist. Once you’ve got the steps down, you can practice at home. Some people prefer not to engage an instructor and teach themselves with YouTube tutorials instead. 

Nose-to-nose shuffle

A popular choice for the less-coordinated that still want a semi-private moment. You’ve probably seen this one before — it’s close, it’s cute, and we’re all for it. You and your boo have an intimate, swaying cuddle on the dancefloor while everyone stands around and goes, “aww, they’re in love”. Then, your guests come up and join you for a special moment with their partners, too. Everyone wins.

Full blown party mode

Go all out and start the dancing with a bang. Don’t feel trapped by the notion that your first dance should be slow and soppy (unless you want it to be!). Often for this one, couples forego the spotlight and invite everyone up at once. No staring audiences, just everyone having a good time together. Bring out the daggy moves and intense limb-flailing. Forget tradition — it’s time to party.

Pick a song

The basics

So, you’ve chosen the general direction of your first dance. How about a song? It should be something with significance, but also something with a good tempo that you can move to. Don’t worry about picking something you think your guests will love, or that song your mum really wanted — do it for you guys. Your first dance should reflect your personalities and be about you both having fun and enjoying the moment.

Keep it short and sweet

Remember, for the majority of first dances, your audience is standing and lovingly watching you. Doing that for four or five minutes starts to get kind of uncomfortable, for them and you. You might like to choose a short song, or just have a moment during the first verse and chorus, before inviting everyone else up to join you.

Can’t find the right tune?

If you both really love a song but don’t think it’s “wedding appropriate” (whatever that means), you might be able to find a cover or acoustic version. If you still can’t find the right one, perhaps it’s time to consider a personalised first dance song. Yep, a song written just for you two!

Go with your gut

Think about your favourite songs and artists, as well as the general feel of your wedding. How can you pair these things together? For the actual dance, do you want to get out of your comfort zone, or stay where you feel safe?  

If something doesn’t feel right, it’s wrong. You should be confident and comfortable on that dancefloor, and have an absolute blast — it’s your wedding, after all!